• Sarah Yoo

How to turn envy into your super-power!

Updated: Aug 28, 2018

Envy is a twosome - it involves you and another person. It's an emotional reaction you have to lacking something that someone else already has. 

It's that feeling you get when you see another woman/man who is super good-looking, in the best relationship and an amazing job who also happens to be the nicest person in the world.

Envy can feel like a real downer yet it's nearly impossible to avoid because it is an inevitable consequence of the comparisons we automatically make when we are with other people.

Did you know that it activates a part of your brain that's involved in processing PHYSICAL PAIN? (Sciencemag.org) No wonder we immediately try to ignore or deny that we are feeling envious! 

I personally get most envious when I see other successful woman entrepreneurs who are earning amazing money while doing what they love and living a lifestyle beyond their wildest imagination.

It especially stings me when they are younger than me, or worse, the same age as me with similar backgrounds.I'm actually GENUINELY happy for them yet there is a part of me that feels so bad about myself because I am nowhere near where she is.I end up asking myself the question, "what on earth have I been doing with my life?" and I don't end up liking the answers.

Contrary to popular belief, envy as an emotion, is not always a bad thing. 

If we can understand why envy is showing up in our lives, it acts as a torch, highlighting our desires right in front of our eyes that otherwise we would have been blind to.

To understand what envy is trying to show us, we need to firstly learn how to deal with it followed by a deeper analysis.

1. Remember - It's a Filtered life.

  • With social media, it's nearly impossible to not engage in the comparison game without feeling terrible about your life. And it's the FREQUENCY that can be a killer!

  • With this in mind, we must remember that what people share online is not the whole picture. Most of the time, people only share the good parts of their lives and this isn't because they are trying to manipulate us into thinking that they are perfect. Most of the times, it's not practical and it's often the last thing on their mind. 

  • For example, when I experience something amazing with Jacob, I often want to share it because I want to share my happiness and I also want it to be an inspiration for some couples. When we are fighting however, I am not thinking about